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Character Submission - Aki Takana

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Post  Aki Takana Wed Jun 04, 2014 4:07 pm

Name: Aki Takana

Age: 14 Birthday: 16 June 1999

God Parent: Athena (but she doesn't know that yet)

Mortal Family: Father: Ryota Takana, Step-mother: Adrienn Takana, half brother: John Takana.

Years in Camp: 0 (1 month)

History: Ryota met Athena when he was studying in America. They had  short but fruitful college relationship. When he returned to Japan, Aki showed up on his doorsteep in Oosaka. They moved to Manhattan when Aki was seven and she lived there peacefully since with her father and his new wife. She's always had trouble making friends and that was how she became much more satisfied in her own company than around other people. She grew up with Arthurian legend as her bedtime stories and college papers for extra reading so her knowledge stretches beyond that of her age group. She got into a bit of trouble with one of her teachers in school as soon as it started back in her sophomore year and somehow ended up being chased by a manticore. It chased her into a forest and trapped her under a tree. She realised one of the large branches above her was semi broken so she taunted the manticore into charging into the tree and aking the branch fall on itself. Somehow she found her way back home, only to get brought to Long Island, dumped out and told they'd come visit. It all left her very perplexed.

Physical Appearance: Aki's Japanese heritage is obvious in her skin colour and dark brown hair but not so much in her stormy grey eyes that are often mistaken for silver. She is of average height and is quite skinny. She wears band t-shirts, mostly of Three Days Grace, over either skinny jeans, cargo pants or shorts. Her favourite shoes are her black combat boots but often favours a pair of converse in summer.

Personality: Aki is a quiet, unsociable girl. She doesn't have many friends and doesn't intend to gain any either. She prefers to keep herself to herself but she is kind and will help anyone she owes. She just doesn't like owing people. She's creative and imaginative. She blames all the time she spent reading as a young girl. She's very smart and never has trouble with her grades even when she's missed a class. She's very honest and can never lie, even if it's to save her or someone else's life. She just can't lie. She also has a very smart mouth and often doesn't know when to keep it shut.

Fatal Flaw: Aki is honest to a fault. This often gets her in trouble because sometimes the truth is better left unsaid. Her mouth runs wild when she's angry and her honesty could probably get her killed one day. Being so honest also makes her a terrible liar.

Talents: Aki has an ear for music. She can determine the instrument, key and be able to repeat a tune just by hearing it once. She's very skilled on the piano and has an amazing singing voice. She wants to learn other instruments but never seems to find the time.

Weapons: A katana. It has a black handle with white diamonds on it and a small silver insignia of a rose. The blade is long and made of celestial bronze and her sheath is decorated with images of the night sky. It was a gift from her father when she first went to camp. He said her mother had left it with him when she was a baby.

Other: Aki hates people who waste her time and risotto. She's easily bribed with chocolate, white, milk or dark. She doesn't mind. But dark is her favourite.


Last edited by Aki Takana on Sat Jun 07, 2014 6:12 am; edited 4 times in total (Reason for editing : making a better application)
Aki Takana
Aki Takana

Posts : 19
Drachmae : 47
Join date : 2014-06-04
Age : 25
Location : CBH

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Olympian Parent: Undeterminded
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Post  Cerulaen Sat Jun 07, 2014 12:22 am

Looks pretty good, just need to fix a few things:

1) I'd like you to add more to your history. For instance, you say "she somehow got away" from that said manticore--it'd be more interesting if you told us how she did, especially since it would be a good way to assess how she deals with things like monsters when she has no experience. You know, how she uses her wits and talents and whatnot. Then besides that, add more things to her background to explain how she was shaped as a person to who she is now.

2) There needs to be something in the personality relating to the Fatal Flaw. Since the Fatal Flaw is in actuality a demigod's most dominant personality trait, one that drives them to do most things, the personality should at least mention, and preferably expound upon it (but not necessarily to the extent that the actual Fatal Flaw section does)

3) Nice Fatal Flaw. Can't say I've seen many of those. I'm going to guess her always being honest would mean she's also a terrible liar? That's definitely something I would add in there as an effect, since that would definitely have an impact on her safety as a person.

4) Where in the world did she acquire a scythe? And in all honesty, it really doesn't seem like an Athena kid weapon...you'll have to justify it.

5) Heh. Chocolate. Milk, white, or dark?
Cerulaen
Cerulaen
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Post  Aki Takana Sat Jun 07, 2014 7:52 pm

Thanks, I've fixed it. Hopefully that's alright. I changed the weapon. Shame, I'm quite fond of scythes.
Aki Takana
Aki Takana

Posts : 19
Drachmae : 47
Join date : 2014-06-04
Age : 25
Location : CBH

Character sheet
Olympian Parent: Undeterminded
Items :

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Post  Cerulaen Mon Jun 09, 2014 7:18 pm

Oh, lol, you actually specified which chocolate in your app. xD I was just joking, but okay. ;-)

Just one question: when you say she "just can't like," are you saying she's actually physically incapable of it, like something is causing her to be unable to lie, or do you just mean she's absolutely terrible at it and has never and will never been/be able to tell a believable lie?

Other than that, looks good.

And oh, if you really want a scythe, you could always stick around and stay active for a few months on here (like hardly anyone ever does...) and then maybe you could make a second for the Titan Army (or Hunters), and your character could probably get away more with using a scythe there, even if it is still impractical as a weapon. xP
Cerulaen
Cerulaen
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Post  Aki Takana Mon Jun 09, 2014 7:22 pm

She cannot tell a believable lie because she believes it to be immoral. She's weird like that.

And I'm fine with a Katana...it's my second choice always. Smile
Aki Takana
Aki Takana

Posts : 19
Drachmae : 47
Join date : 2014-06-04
Age : 25
Location : CBH

Character sheet
Olympian Parent: Undeterminded
Items :

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Post  Cerulaen Mon Jun 09, 2014 7:30 pm

Lawl, you can add the thinking it immoral bit into it, then. But alright, approved! Just wait for another staff approval and you'll be set.
Cerulaen
Cerulaen
Match Maker

Posts : 1367
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Post  Aki Takana Mon Jun 09, 2014 7:33 pm

Aki Takana wrote:Name: Aki Takana

Age: 14 Birthday: 16 June 1999

God Parent: Athena (but she doesn't know that yet)

Mortal Family: Father: Ryota Takana, Step-mother: Adrienn Takana, half brother: John Takana.

Years in Camp: 0 (1 month)

History: Ryota met Athena when he was studying in America. They had  short but fruitful college relationship. When he returned to Japan, Aki showed up on his doorsteep in Oosaka. They moved to Manhattan when Aki was seven and she lived there peacefully since with her father and his new wife. She's always had trouble making friends and that was how she became much more satisfied in her own company than around other people. She grew up with Arthurian legend as her bedtime stories and college papers for extra reading so her knowledge stretches beyond that of her age group. She got into a bit of trouble with one of her teachers in school as soon as it started back in her sophomore year and somehow ended up being chased by a manticore. It chased her into a forest and trapped her under a tree. She realised one of the large branches above her was semi broken so she taunted the manticore into charging into the tree and aking the branch fall on itself. Somehow she found her way back home, only to get brought to Long Island, dumped out and told they'd come visit. It all left her very perplexed.

Physical Appearance: Aki's Japanese heritage is obvious in her skin colour and dark brown hair but not so much in her stormy grey eyes that are often mistaken for silver. She is of average height and is quite skinny. She wears band t-shirts, mostly of Three Days Grace, over either skinny jeans, cargo pants or shorts. Her favourite shoes are her black combat boots but often favours a pair of converse in summer.

Personality: Aki is a quiet, unsociable girl. She doesn't have many friends and doesn't intend to gain any either. She prefers to keep herself to herself but she is kind and will help anyone she owes. She just doesn't like owing people. She's creative and imaginative. She blames all the time she spent reading as a young girl. She's very smart and never has trouble with her grades even when she's missed a class. She's very honest and can never lie, even if it's to save her or someone else's life. She just can't lie, she thinks it to be immoral. She also has a very smart mouth and often doesn't know when to keep it shut.

Fatal Flaw: Aki is honest to a fault. This often gets her in trouble because sometimes the truth is better left unsaid. Her mouth runs wild when she's angry and her honesty could probably get her killed one day. Being so honest also makes her a terrible liar.

Talents: Aki has an ear for music. She can determine the instrument, key and be able to repeat a tune just by hearing it once. She's very skilled on the piano and has an amazing singing voice. She wants to learn other instruments but never seems to find the time.

Weapons: A katana. It has a black handle with white diamonds on it and a small silver insignia of a rose. The blade is long and made of celestial bronze and her sheath is decorated with images of the night sky. It was a gift from her father when she first went to camp. He said her mother had left it with him when she was a baby.

Other: Aki hates people who waste her time and risotto. She's easily bribed with chocolate, white, milk or dark. She doesn't mind. But dark is her favourite.
Aki Takana
Aki Takana

Posts : 19
Drachmae : 47
Join date : 2014-06-04
Age : 25
Location : CBH

Character sheet
Olympian Parent: Undeterminded
Items :

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Post  Aki Takana Mon Jun 09, 2014 7:34 pm

Coolio so thanks a mil
Aki Takana
Aki Takana

Posts : 19
Drachmae : 47
Join date : 2014-06-04
Age : 25
Location : CBH

Character sheet
Olympian Parent: Undeterminded
Items :

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Post  GeneralArin Wed Jun 11, 2014 10:19 pm

That's because everything's awesome with a katana.

lol, I know of a book character where he's just plain awful at lying. He gets better at deception by just not telling the whole truth, but all of his attempts at straight up lying are pretty bad. (This doesn't have to do with anything, but I'm tired and felt like sharing random things.)

lol, Aki just tells it like it is. Good for her. XP

Looks good to me, Approved. Welcome to the site
GeneralArin
GeneralArin
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